MAY 10, 2017 — When I saw my sister Anastasia yesterday she was in pain as would be expected of anyone who had a broken hip and a broken ankle. I noted she has a pressure sore on her heal with what appears to be a blood blister as well. You have to wonder how someone they keep in bed all day has gotten a blood blister on their heal. When we got her re-positioned where she was not sitting on her broken ankle and it was not pressed up against the side of the gerri chair she felt a little relief. I always bring her iPad with me so she may watch a quick TV episode or listen to her music since I am only allowed to see her for an hour three times a week. We always leave time to pray and for her to just lay her head on mine or my shoulder as she has always done for comfort, hers or mine.
Her room has a TV but it located to the left of her bed where she cannot see it and it has never been on when visitors have come to see her. It is my understanding she is left in a darkened room (she is not near the window and unable to turn on the light) with nothing to watch. I asked a member of the staff about her TV, its location and if it was kept on and was lied to straight to my face. Strike one and you only get one strike when it comes to my sister and lying.
Anastasia initially had a roommate but she was due to be moved to another room Sunday or Monday, which means Anastasia is in the room alone… a very scary thought. While staff have attempted to detain visitors, so far we have not had any major issues regarding the visitation of priests, at least not the local ones. Our priests have not been able to make it all the way out to where she is located yet due to their schedules and it being approximately 20 miles.
One of the things you first notice about a majority of the staff at this facility is they are rude and will ignore pretty much anything you say or ask no matter how nice or cordial you are to them. It is also my understanding that this is passed onto the patients that are not able to speak up for themselves. There are exceptions to this, in fact the young lady that was at the desk Monday evening was very nice and very helpful as was one of the nurses when my sister in law visited. I did make note of the names but will not mention them here. I will just write a letter to the administrator informing her of what a wonderful pair of employees she has in this young lady and nurse; because you always give praise and credit where it is due especially in this type of environment.
This particular facility, in addition to the homicide they they had a few years ago, their most recent inspection in December 2016 showed 18 health deficiencies; double the state average of 9 and over double the national average of 7.2. When I mentioned the facility rating and the homicide Mr. Labowitz did not exhibit the least bit of surprise, which tells me he must have already known about the facilities reputation.
I will not repeat specifically what Mr. Labowitz said but will say he attempted to blame me for where they her guardians placed my sister. Maybe at least Mr. Labowitz is feeling guilt or remorse knowing that it was their placement of my sister and their actions afterward that led to her broken hip and broken ankle. Attempting to shift blame is not going to change the FACT that I didn’t place her in a nursing home; a nursing home that allegedly left an eye infection to fester; a nursing home that allegedly saw nothing wrong with repetitive bruising and injuries; a nursing home who they Anastasia’s guardians chose to blindly believe; a nursing home that allegedly broke Anastasia’s hip and then attempted to hide it. And then STILL placed Anastasia in another poorly rated nursing home and surprise she winds up with a broken ankle. But yet the Guardians project THEIR bad CHOICES onto me. They attempt to make me responsible for THEIR actions, for why THEY placed my sister Anastasia in NOT ONE BUT THREE poorly rated and managed nursing facilities with injurious consequences.
Psychology Today defines psychological projection as a theory in which humans defend themselves against their own unconscious impulses or qualities (both positive and negative) by denying their existence in themselves while attributing them to others. Furthermore Projection of guilt of a severe conscience (possibly severe injury to a vulnerable adult as a direct consequence of their actions) is another form of defense, one which may be linked to the making of false accusations, personal or political. We won’t get into projection regarding certain political folks. Shhhhh. lol
Each time I see my sister she looks at me with an expression of why? When she lays her head against mine or on my shoulder and I begin to sniffle I tell her it is my allergies. I tell her this because she is my big sister and as such she worries about me and has an inherent need to look after me, as she did when we were growing up. I need her to conserve her strength to get through what her guardians are doing to her. With God’s help and through His grace we will both make it through.
Which brings me to the title of this update. I will close with this:
The Bible tells us we should pray for our enemies. For a long time I just never understood how one could sincerely pray for their enemies, for those individuals who were intentionally causing harm or pain to you or loved ones. It always felt hypocritical to ask God to bless my/our enemies because God blessing them was the farthest thing from my mind; a few plagues maybe, lol, but never a blessing.
A few years ago we had a parish retreat where the speaker was a Dominican priest. He explained things in a way that made perfect sense. I realized that in praying for my enemies I wasn’t asking God to bless them I was asking God to save them; I was praying for the salvation of their souls. At that point praying for my enemies no longer felt hypocritical. Not that I do not still have my moments where I wish God would smote them or bring on boils, but generally as a rule my prayers are for their salvation and that God show them and let them know exactly what they are doing, the pain, harm and damage they are inflicting.
I thank everyone for supporting us in this, I thank you for your continued prayers, and for signing the petition.
God Bless You All and have a Blessed Night and day tomorrow.